An Unknown Reality

It was raining heavily out there, when I first heard someone crying. It wasn’t something I was looking forward to notice right after waking up.

I have been living all by myself lately, with regrets and choices I didn’t go out for. It hasn’t been easy to stand where I am today.

(A soldier who no longer serves in the army, a being who is looking for reasons to stay alive. It is about the journey that never made it till the end. A journey, filled with blood. It all started when he was suspended from the army for not following the commands. A decision he is proud about.)

I just sat by the window, watching the raindrops kiss the surface of the earth, making pattering sounds, with birds looking for a hiding place, people looking for some shelter. Nature comes out to be a tricky place at times. The amount of times we appreciate nature comes out to be the exact right number of times we run and hide from saving it. Pretty decent to digest, isn’t it?

It felt like, the sky is ready to make amends with the actions it didn’t commit, yet everyone runs from this very fact. At times, it makes me think that is it just me who thinks this way or are there more people who actually put pressure on the way the brain needs to work. Disheartening!

(While it still rained out there, he came out to wander around and take notice of everything he missed, when he was out on war, but it does not end there. All those running emotions and distinctive thoughts are just there, where they need to be in such a mean world. All he did, was to look out for each one of them present around him, and somewhere down the line, he managed to do that.)

I walked through the park which was just around the corner, and I happened to notice some unusual things. Children were playing in the rain with no fear while their parents looked at them and smile. They enjoyed every emotion that nature had to deliver, and not a single child got tired of it.

When I was on the battlefield, I had people running around in fear, even if it was raining. They just wanted to survive another wave that was thrown at them. It does not feel good, when you return back home with such a heavy heart. I had no control over the situations over there, but I managed to make my way out of it.

I was given a rifle that I never used. I was given a uniform that I was never proud of. I was given a designation that makes me hate myself even more. I was given a reason to fight but I chose not to. What I chose was the belief that I never had earlier in my life. I walked with that belief that the people will see the sun rising, with peace around them, but it seemed otherwise.

I made some efforts to retaliate but then, I was sent back, and that’s how it has been for me.

Whenever you try to stand for a cause, all you get is the road that you need to choose for something indifferent. We get options but not the ones you would want to bank upon but the ones stated by people you’re retaliating against. What do I call it? Tyranny? I’m still trying to cope and recover from the damages caused by the sanctions and decisions I made.

(Sometimes, we do land in situations where even the reality poses to be a threat to a being’s existence. How can someone work across and help himself in such a transitional phase? We often live between harmonies that don’t really exist, and that has been the very case with him.)

Today, I sit on one of the benches of the park and close my eyes to take a deep breath. Something I haven’t practiced for a long time. There are a lot of things that need to sink in but I’ll give it some time. My hands have a lot of blood on it that will take time to wash away. They are guilty yet deceased.

Today, I sit beside peace, throwing my eyes in all the corners of the street, looking for fear, love and reasons to breathe. The streets are filled with such things yet I hold myself from all of it.

Today, I sit to observe the plant growing out loud, parents taking good care of their child, wind blowing through the leaves and how the sun goes down.

I live in an unknown reality which is quite difficult to fetch initially, but the most important thing is that I’m alive.

The Sown Seed

Stand and make way to breathe
Into the soil, we sow the seed,
Our tears convey our stories
To carry those who still bleed!

While they seek refuge from hate
Their disbelief is a result of the written fate!
With cries and lies,
Their lives are stabbed, to humiliate!

With no land and names,
They built their houses under gated flames!
It’s their life, a result of choices
And what not – trapped beneath rotating frames!

The motion of madness seeks,
While the buried child still speaks!
The emotions still wander
For days and endless weeks!

A game of options and decisions,
Leads to submissive divisions,
Emptying to recover and sustain
Just to walk again with broken visions!

While the helpless souls make their way,
They’re bullied to bits, with each passing day!
It’s the struggle to survive the war
Through tormented actions – needless to say!

The sufferings and their aftermath,
The result of nothing but a painted wrath!
We are bodies in netted shells,
Waiting to walk through the lost path!

While nothing melts in this cold,
It’s the nation, caught by men too old!

Buried Guns

Trapped behind the wall
Breathing close, to take the fall,
It’s the hour to survive
Through the demise caused by their call!

While they hide behind their own doors,
We march and make the most of our chores!
The streets are silent and taken
By forces, behind all the planned wars!

All the children, a result of abuse,
Beaten against the ground, to suffer and lose!
We carry such credentials
To sympathize and later choose!

Dead sons of those weeping mothers,
Lost bodies, found of our brothers,
We rise to create history,
In the name of none but others!

Cries and lies, marking the end,
Making way for the allies to defend.
It’s the lost legacy
Of someone who was once a lost friend!

We live with hate and in disguise,
Frightened from the forgotten cries,
While the air takes the last breath,
We survive another scare by those eyes!

In the end, we live a forgone life
To hide, run, fall and strife!
Our lives are turned and trapped
Beneath the edge of his knife!

With burning thoughts, in the name of our sons,
We still rise from ashes and those buried guns!

Until We Rise

Helpless, yet deceived
Down, but still received!
From the rain, we rise,
In the midst, but still believed!

It’s that time of the day
To make amends and say,
We cry upon, we rise
To climb through an unwanted bay!

Pretending, ignoring the claimed fact,
Walking through the woods to act!
With this success, we rise
To bury the shell and that forgotten artifact!

Remembering an old song, we sing,
Forging through it, we bring,
It’s dawn, where we rise
Through the woods, written in spring!

Lives, lies, left helpless
Existence, reality left hopeless,
But, we breathe and we rise
To mark our vision, that’s kept defenceless!

The roads, we cover
Through ways, we discover,
It’s the will, through which we rise,
To acknowledge and later recover!

We crown the deserved ones,
Carry the ones with no sons,
Beyond hope, we rise
Making way, to bury those guns!

Through lost hope, we rise,
But, hope prevails, until we rise!

Through The Skies

While we touch the sky
Lights wave through, to fly
In the wake of
Nothing, but to learn and try!

While we touch the stars,
The air, skins through endless scars.
They are positioned to align
Behind those parallel bars!

While we live to breathe
The cycle continues to seethe,
It goes on in circles,
Just to bury the lost seed!

While we climb through the sky,
Doors make way to shut and die!
The stairs are kept still
To cause a trajectory that high!

While we believe in a source,
Every element comes down to form a force!
It’s the epitome of life,
Lived by dead men, in a natural course!

While we breathe this air,
We live in misconceptions, and share.
Our emotions are kept untouched
With the help of his remorseful prayer!

Through the skies, we compete
To convey and later complete!
Through the skies, we stand
To spread and later deplete!

The sanctuaries, they divide
The centuries, they guide!
Live and breathe with pride,
Through the skies, we hide!

A Deceptive Dream

Cringing through the doors,
Playing through carved shores,
Riding at submissive dawn
To carry those established chores!

Submerge and retract
Into the days to act.
Walk, will he?
For the sake to attract!

The eyes, they burn
Along with a vigorous turn
They merge and create
An equilibrium, to later learn!

Prodigy, an act of desperation,
Animosity, a resulting nation.
They run through the hours
To create an act of liberation!

While the wind speaks,
Nature crumbles and seeks.
It’s the background, a mere field,
To annotate, while he still climbs endless peaks!

The road, guiding through the trees
With directions, piercing across the loose breeze.
He waits, while the nature folds
Into the midst of an endless ease!

He climbs, falls and learns,
While the projection takes sudden turns,
He waits and seeps
Through the hope, he still earns!

The ties bound to make a stream,
While he’s the result of a deceptive dream!

Ode To The Fall

While he rises against the sun
The fall begins with a mere turn,
The leaves remain untouched
With directions to seek and later run!

He walks to make a living
Consistent enough for filling,
He draws his life to survive
With nature, next to fulfilling!

The dust covers his skin
While he’s only meant to sin,
It’s a disguise, planned to provoke
With a motive to secure a win!

The rays, his only source of sustenance
His surroundings, an act of influence
With force and utmost vitality
Nurturing him with diminished maintenance!

He marches towards the cave
With the hope to guide and pave,
It’s the call for his notions
To light his seeded grave.

His corpse shines bright
While his thoughts, left with a light,
He sings and eventually wins
With nothing but a rainy sight!

In the end, he writes his own song
With words, a bit bitter and strong,
He rests and breathes
Into the letter, written a bit long!

Live and summon to the call,
With an ode to his fall!

A Passage – Part II

While everyone made their way to the open fields, I somehow managed to get the women and children to another village and asked them to stay put for some days. I regretted every single bit of my actions and words at that point in time, keeping the loved ones away from one another.

(The villagers now know what they were heading towards, but little did it break them. They gathered all the ammunition they had to, and marked their checkpoints and bunkers to make things easier for them.)

I’d love to say this but, each one of them worked throughout the night to make sure, nothing happens to their beloved home. I realized how close these people were to each other, and it wasn’t astonishing to my senses at all – they all grew together.

(0200 HRS)

(There was a stun-silence all around, making every village a bit curious, as to what’s causing this silence. Many had predicted that something is coming their way, but some of them denied it.)

Did you hear that? I sensed something moving through the streets of the village. What could it be?

“I’ll go and check what is happening up there. They have an added advantage because they’re at a height, so it will be easier for them to plan an attack on us, so when I come back, we will begin to head up north to gain some height” he ordered.

(He went up through the fields and managed to observe the movement. Little did the forces know that he was one of them and was equipped with most of the gears. He looked all across the area through his night vision binoculars and came across some men guarding the corners of the village and some sniping the area from some height. It was enough for him to know that the forces came with a plan and the villagers would need a better understanding of how to fight this war.)

“Everyone! We are surrounded by their troops, and to have an advantage over them, we need to gain more height. You all need to know that it is our home, they don’t know how to tackle their surroundings, and we have to use this to our advantage. They might come out to be better but it is all on us, how we react and fight” he addressed.

I saw things up there that I only saw in civil wars. It is going to be ugly, I might lose hope but what commands our strength is the ‘reason to believe’.

There were some boxes of explosives, and all we had were old rifles. We had outdated gears, but they were not aware of this situation. It will be unfair for all the villagers, if I said ‘we already lost the battle’, because they had been putting all their heart and energy in getting prepared.

(Suddenly the villagers heard some gunshots in their village. He knew it wasn’t any villager, but someone from the forces because no villager had an automatic gun. The curiosity was evident on everyone’s face. The villagers were attacked by several questions such as, ‘did they leave anyone behind?’, ‘did anyone from the group leave and went to launch an attack?’, ‘was it an animal that got shot?’, ‘what just happened up there in the village?’ it made everyone a bit nervous.

(He only had the support of not more than fifty people, who would fight against such forces. He knew the possibilities and potential outcomes but how does it matter, when everyone’s objective was the same. While the whole group headed up north, it was all down to their positions and places they’ll set themselves up in, to keep an eye on soldiers guarding the village.)

“Everyone here, we will attack in waves from two different directions. I have some explosives with me, and we just need to use them as decoys. It is really important we hit them once and hard enough for them to believe. We will only get limited opportunities, and we need to make use of them. This is your home, and it’s yours. We might fall down to our knees, but respect every man fighting next to you” he said.

..

“You two, take positions here”.

I’ll go and spread this wave for you. Remember – all your eyes should be on my hand”.

“Wait for that gap”.

“Alright, let us take positions”.

..

(0330 HRS)

(Eight people were involved in the first wave attack.)

..

(He gave them their first signal to attack a single bullet at their targets. While eight bullets were fired, he threw the grenade at the other end of the village to create a sense of confusion.)

..

(Six soldiers were killed with mere eight bullets and their first wave attack was a success. Everyone changed positions and ends to make matters a bit difficult for the soldiers, but he stayed put. He was left with only two grenades and this time, it was all up to the men of the village to make decisions.)

I stood at my position, while everyone went onto different ones and for the first time I saw hope. I stayed and I just hoped while we were preparing for our second wave attack. This time I was a spectator to their decisions. If we blow up, we are done, but if this wave works, we break in the village.

(And, there it was, he gave further signals to shoot another round of eight bullets. This time around, the soldiers knew about the situations and were much aware of the on-going activities. The villagers played in a smart way, and shot seven soldiers this time, while he threw yet another grenade at the other end, so that the confusion gives the villagers the time to regroup and take new positions.)

I waved at the villagers to get in the village from the northern end (where the first attack was launched). I had the last grenade in my hand, and all I had to do was, throw it in the hub bunker.

I managed to do that, though.

(The soldiers kept up with their shooting, but this time they prepared explosives. They weren’t just explosives, but explosives thrown at ten different positions at the very same time, not by soldiers, but by an automated turret. The third wave was a suicidal objective to consider, but they had to decide quickly, whether to fall back, or to remain in the field.)

I ran to my new position, that was within the village, right next to the southern bunker. I couldn’t give orders to the villagers or let them know about the turret present in the village. I held out my binoculars to see if there were any other turrets present in the vicinity, and there it was, another one at the eastern end of the village.

It was getting difficult with every moment, so I decided to regroup with the villagers.

(As soon as he decided to regroup with everyone. One of the villagers entered the turret’s area, and got multiple shots through his body. The active turret made the other soldiers watch out for such activities. This was the first time the soldiers knew about the villagers’ positions, and what happened next was something, which wasn’t planned.)

(They shot the remaining seven villagers out of nowhere.)

“What in the name of God is happening here?”

(In a matter of five minutes, the soldiers moved in, and spread wide enough to locate the other villagers, and speared their bullets through them. All of the villagers were left vulnerable and shot mercilessly by the forces.)

..

(He went down on his knees, asking God for mercy and answers. He blew everything up. He blew their positions unknowingly.)

..

(Back when he came across a device in his jacket’s pocket (A Passage Part I), it was the GPS device, which remained at the same place. It remained in the jacket, and one of the villagers wore that jacket. The forces had nothing to do but to plan this big move on executing the men present at the position shown in their tracking device.)

Everything’s finished for me. At that very moment I lost this battle and gave up. What will I say to their families? What about their daughters, sons, mothers and fathers? Am I to be blamed for this?

Who will take such a responsibility?

(It was the darkest hour in the history of innocents being killed for no reason. it wasn’t his fault, and it’s important to know every effort that he made in the favor of the villagers and their ambitions. Such events are happening in every country, in every state with every native village that has been there for centuries. The government takes the initiative of taking the land from such people, and when they retaliate, they’re tagged with a term – Terrorists. We have made such native people behave in an aggressive way because they know if they won’t retaliate, they might end up with nothing and zero options. Such forces are deployed to perform these kinds of activities to clear the area so that the government can utilize that very space for commercial benefits.)

“Remember, try to go through the roots next time you come across a terrorist activity at a native hideout, before drawing your final conclusions”

A Passage – Part I

I was on my way back to a village, where I was staying for two weeks. The roads I drove through were pretty submissive. At times, I lost control of my bike, and fell off, but I had my riding gear intact. Little did it help!

(It all starts from a burdened thought. Living a lie is something we all tend to fear and avoid, at the same time. This was an evident situation, which was present in his life. Dragging his own thoughts became his only enemy. So, he set out on a journey. A journey, which sees all of it. All the situations, changes, realizations, and what not? A transformation! He never knew, what would happen next.)

(2100 HRS)

What is happening?

I guess, it’s the first night, when my eyes have nothing to witness. This quiet night has a lot to offer today. I’d just wait it out to see, what’s coming my way. Well, who would’ve thought, I would be heading back with different plans in my mind.

..

What was that?

What did I just see, right there?

(He lived on the mountains, breathing cold air, hunting for survival but at the end of the day, brought it all back to the village he stayed in. A village where food was a luxury, and life was just a mere option. He lived for the people and their dreams, keeping his life on the edge. He hunted when the sun used to go down and when the birds used to bring back all the hard work to their nests.)

I was anxious and had no idea about it. I tried looking for that very thing, but soon lost track of it.

(It was getting really dark and even the electricity had given up on these streets he was riding on. Once he was back in the village, he heard a lot of people crying. This situation left him clueless, and brought back that very feeling, when he saw something running across the road, and suddenly disappearing in thin air. He made his way into the village and saw some of the local people beating an unknown outsider.)

Hey, Stop…!

What’s wrong with you all? Why would you beat someone like this? Who is he, anyway?

“He has been spying on us for quite a while now. We were told about some men who wanted to infiltrate and make our village a base to initiate something” the villager exclaimed.

Why would someone do this? What do we have here? Are we working on something?
This is daunting!

(No one had an idea about anything, until the handcuffed stranger started talking.)

“You know what? We have been monitoring everyone’s movements for a month, and all we could gather was, nothing! We were told that, this village is feeding a runaway refugee, and we just wanted to make sure that these kinds of activities aren’t happening. We were even told that, he has been supplying and funding a village in order to bring back his lost status” the handcuffed stranger said.

(Everyone had a numb and pale expression with nothing to buy from the whole statement. Each and every being of this village trusted one another but they were still missing on something. They all looked at each other with a lot of unanswered questions. By the time, anyone could speak, he made his way down to the stranger who was caught by the villagers.)

“Who gave you this information, and how does it help you?”
“Can you tell me what is going on?”
“What do you know about it, and the most important thing – who are you?” he asked the stranger.

“I’ve told you everything I was asked to do.”
“I know nothing else now” the stranger answered.

Well, this doesn’t solve anything. What is the whole situation about? I haven’t heard anyone talking about it in this very village. Am I missing something or is this a lie?

(The situation was worsening up for good, and numbers weren’t adding up.)

Should I go back on that road again, or is there any clue present in the village itself? Where do I start from?

“I still don’t understand, what’s going on here!” he said in disarray.

(After a while, he realized what had happened in the village. He looked at everyone present in the village, and this time around he had his eyes digging in for something he never had any idea about.)

It felt different, when I saw each one of them a bit closer. I found out that, only I am the one who stands on a different ground here. Each and every working body of this village felt the same, and moreover, they all did the same thing throughout the day. Was I the one who was taken in, or was it a story I was narrating for all these days?

I rushed to the hut I lived in, and found out some stains of blood. I chose not to speak about it, but I could sense something happening now. It was scary at first but whatever it was, it all spoke volumes.

What on earth is this?
Whose jacket is this? What is it doing in my hut?

(He picked up the jacket and there was something kept in one of its pockets.)
It says ‘HAVE FAITH’.

I checked all the remaining pockets of the jacket, and I found nothing else. What could this possibly mean? What is happening down in this village? What are these people doing down here?

(It was pretty evident that he was involved heavily in this situation, and the message added strength to it. While everyone remained clueless, he somehow got to know what was about to come.)

..

“EVACUATE, EVACUATE EVERYBODY, immediately” he addressed the people of the village.

(Everyone in the village wanted an explanation to this whole cause, but little did they know about anything.)

“I think we are surrounded by a lot of men with multiple weapons, and I somehow know, what’s going to happen the very next second” he explained.

It was really difficult for me to explain the reasons, aftermath and the situation to each and every soul of this village. I went ahead and gathered everyone in the local field and made them know the situation they all were in.

“While I was returning back to the village today, a lot of unknown vehicles passed by, and at that moment I had no clue about it. When I pushed myself ahead, I saw something crossing my way and then disappearing in the thick. It wasn’t a coincidence that all such things were happening around me, but there was a sense of unrest taking birth in this beautiful valley. I still ignored every fact until I saw you all with an unknown outsider and a paper in my jacket’s pocket. This village has been the reason for your survival, and no one has the right to take it from you, but today something big will happen. There are a lot of things happening in my head, and if you examine the silence and panic around you, you all would believe me. We cannot stand up against armed men, we cannot and we won’t. If you want me to talk on the ground-level terms, you need to know that it will be difficult for us to get out of here through the streets and trails”

“I was sent here to keep an eye on this village. The government deployed me with ammunition and aid, so that I can stay safe and do their work, that was to push you all away from this land. I will not do it, neither will I let them do theirs. I know, you must be waiting to execute me right away, but that’s not something you’d want to do right now. I was sent here to do their business, but I am not doing it their way. As soon as I came here in this village, I knew there was nothing here, and the government lied to me. They just wanted your land and what not? Your lives! Since I first came here, I have been working all night to build a passage for everyone. It’s just beneath my hut. That underground passage will lead us to open fields, a hundred meters away from this village. We need to prepare as soon as possible. They won’t waste enough time in killing us all and taking over this land. I want all of you to take your guns and reach the open fields. I’ll help the women and children, and will guide them to a safe zone” he addressed.

(The villagers were left shocked and surprised at the same time. It was difficult for them to believe the whole scenario. While everyone prepared for this evacuation plan, he knew what was coming. He knew it was difficult for him to come back after it gets started, but he considered this to be more than his family and life.)

(To be continued…)

A Cursed Child

When the world sleeps,
He folds and later weeps
In the midst of a crusade
Belonging to the one who seeps!

His thoughts are next to none,
While his vision shines like a nomad sun,
His life, a result of endless cycles,
Covered with a sporadic run!

He wakes, with a belief
But ends the day, with souring grief
The border he goes through
Works to provide his aid and relief!

He covers, and lives for quite less
Breathing through cold air, his only access
The wheel, running behind his back
Changes the day with a decimated process!

Soaking climate, resurrected air,
He walks through utmost despair!
Curtained life, undecided background,
His only way to relate and bear!

The ladder, he climbs
Forged his arrival with multiple rhymes,
His hand, being the resulting factor
Allows him to live at all times!

Every breath he takes,
It leaps and later breaks!
Every sound he lives with
Has left him with multiple mistakes!

He wears an undefined crown,
Leaving him to struggle and later drown!